Captain’s Blog

The place to be for a PhD

I’m won’t be applying for a PhD any time soon, but if I were, my shortlonglist would probably look a bit like this.

Blackjack and hookers meme
I’m gonna make my own university ranking, with blackjack and hookers!

Prestige plays a major role in academia. It’s why researchers dream of publishing their work in prestigious journals, like Nature and Science. It’s why you can find Harvard University sweaters all over the world, even though Harvard doesn’t actually have that many students. And it’s why people get all giddy about an opportunity to work or study at Oxford, even though there are plenty of other institutions that may have more to offer.

A decent chunk of a university’s prestige comes from rankings, of which there are many. .

While prestige can afford you certain privileges, it does not play that much of a role in your day-to-day life as a graduate student. Rankings tend to be based on research output and recognition thereof, but you’re likely more concerned about things like quality of education, facilities, student life, affordability, the likelihood that your supervisor will be a Machiavellian psychopath, or the university’s primary topics of research.

Most rankings are therefore kind of useless for students.

I’m going to exacerbate this problem by introducing my own ranking, the Toilet Paper Rankings, which is solely based on the number of summarised papers in which an organisation, which is usually – but not always – a university, is mentioned as an affiliation. The list is updated daily, although it usually only changes once a week, when I publish a new paper summary.

Toilet Paper Rankings

1–2usCarnegie Mellon University8
3usNorth Carolina State University7
4–7nlDelft University of Technology4
4–7ilThe Hebrew University of Jerusalem4
4–7deUniversity of Stuttgart4
4–7chUniversity of Zurich4
8–15seChalmers University of Technology3
8–15usIBM Corporation3
8–15auMonash University3
8–15caQueen’s University3
8–15fiTampere University3
8–15chUniversità della Svizzera italiana3
8–15fiUniversity of Oulu3
8–15nlVrije Universiteit Amsterdam3
16–52ilBen-Gurion University of the Negev2
16–52caConcordia University2
16–52usCornell University2
16–52auCurtin University2
16–52nlEindhoven University of Technology2
16–52jpKyushu University2
16–52seLund University2
16–52usNorthern Arizona University2
16–52nlOpen University of the Netherlands2
16–52cnPeking University2
16–52caPolytechnique Montréal2
16–52sgSingapore Management University2
16–52usUC Berkeley2
16–52gbgb-engUniversity College London2
16–52nzUniversity of Auckland2
16–52chUniversity of Bern2
16–52caUniversity of British Columbia2
16–52caUniversity of Calgary2
16–52usUniversity of Chicago2
16–52seUniversity of Gothenburg2
16–52nlUniversity of Groningen2
16–52fiUniversity of Helsinki2
16–52fiUniversity of Jyväskylä2
16–52luUniversity of Luxembourg2
16–52usUniversity of Maryland2
16–52noUniversity of Oslo2
16–52gbgb-engUniversity of Oxford2
16–52deUniversity of Passau2
16–52itUniversity of Salerno2
16–52gbgb-engUniversity of Sheffield2
16–52usUniversity of Southern California2
16–52caUniversity of Victoria2
16–52usUniversity of Washington2
16–52caYork University2
16–52chZurich University of Applied Sciences2
53–235dkAalborg University1
53–235fiAalto University1
53–235dkAarhus University1
53–235usAllegheny College1
53–235usAugusta University1
53–235nlAvans University of Applied Sciences1
53–235cnBaidu, Inc.1
53–235ilBar-Ilan University1
53–235eses-ctBarcelona Supercomputing Center1
53–235cnBeijing Institute of Technology1
53–235trBilkent University1
53–235seBlekinge Institute of Technology1
53–235usBoeing Research & Technology Europe1
53–235gbBritish Geological Survey1
53–235usCalifornia Institute of Technology1
53–235usCalifornia Polytechnic State University1
53–235seCarmenta Geospatial Technologies1
53–235usClarkson University1
53–235usClemson University1
53–235krClova AI Research1
53–235usColumbia Basin College1
53–235usColumbia University1
53–235noConceptos Consulting1
53–235unDon’t Forget the Bubbles1
53–235usDrexel University1
53–235gbgb-engDurham University1
53–235deEberhard Karls Universität Tübingen1
53–235nlExact International Development1
53–235brFederal Institute of Rio Grande do Norte1
53–235brFederal University of Amazonas1
53–235brFederal University of Bahia1
53–235brFederal University of Minas Gerais1
53–235brFederal University of Pará1
53–235brFederal University of Rio Grande do Norte1
53–235brFederal University of Sergipe1
53–235atFHV Vorarlberg University of Applied Sciences1
53–235deFraunhofer Institute for Experimental Software Engineering1
53–235itFree University of Bozen-Bolzano1
53–235usGeorge Fox University1
53–235usGeorge Mason University1
53–235usGeorgia Institute of Technologyy1
53–235deHarz University of Applied Sciences1
53–235gbgb-engImperial College London1
53–235usIowa State University1
53–235irIran Telecommunication Research Center1
53–235itItalian National Research Council1
53–235usJane Street Capital1
53–235nlJeronimus Academy of Data Science1
53–235usJet Propulsion Laboratory1
53–235czJetBrains Research1
53–235nlJheronimus Academy of Data Science1
53–235usJohns Hopkins University1
53–235usKansas State University1
53–235usKennesaw State University1
53–235usKent State University1
53–235gbgb-engKing’s College London1
53–235krKorea Press Foundation1
53–235auLady Cilento Children’s Hospital1
53–235xxLeadership Footprint1
53–235deLeibniz Institute for Neurobiology1
53–235gbgb-engLeicester Royal Infirmary1
53–235nlLeiden University1
53–235usLoyola College1
53–235caMcGill University1
53–235deMETOP GmbH1
53–235usMontclair State University1
53–235auMurdoch University1
53–235fiNokia Bell Labs1
53–235usNorthwestern University1
53–235noNorwegian University of Science and Technology1
53–235usOakland University1
53–235seÖrebro University1
53–235usOregon State University1
53–235noØstfold University College1
53–235deOtto von Guericke University Magdeburg1
53–235dePaderborn University1
53–235dePhilipps University Marburg1
53–235ptPolytechnic Institute of Tomar1
53–235caPolytechnique Montreal1
53–235nlRadboud University1
53–235gbRolls-Royce plc1
53–235deSaarland University1
53–235lvSEB Life & Pension Holding AB Riga Branch1
53–235cnShanghai Jiao Tong University1
53–235noSimula Research Laboratory1
53–235nlSoftware Improvement Group1
53–235usStanford University1
53–235usStevens Institute1
53–235auSwinburne University of Technology1
53–235auSydney Children’s Hospital1
53–235deTechnische Universität München1
53–235usTexas A&M University1
53–235usThe College of William and Mary1
53–235cncn-hkThe Hong Kong University of Science and Technology1
53–235nlThe Liberators1
53–235gbgb-engThe Open University1
53–235gbgb-engThe Royal London Hospital1
53–235usThe University of New Mexico1
53–235nlTilburg University1
53–235mxUAM Iztapalapa1
53–235usUC Davis1
53–235saUmm Al-Qura University1
53–235coUniversidad de los Andes1
53–235esUniversidad Rey Juan Carlos1
53–235brUniversidade Federal de Pernambuco1
53–235brUniversidade Tecnológica Federal do Paraná1
53–235chUniversità della Svizzera italiana1
53–235ieUniversity College Cork1
53–235beUniversity College Ghent1
53–235auUniversity of Adelaide1
53–235usUniversity of Alabama1
53–235caUniversity of Alberta1
53–235nlUniversity of Amsterdam1
53–235chUniversity of Applied Sciences Northwestern Switzerland1
53–235usUniversity of Arizona1
53–235usUniversity of Arkansas1
53–235eses-ctUniversity of Barcelona1
53–235chUniversity of Basel1
53–235brUniversity of Brasília1
53–235usUniversity of California, Los Angeles1
53–235gbgb-engUniversity of Cambridge1
53–235esUniversity of Castilla-La Mancha1
53–235esUniversity of Castilla–La Mancha1
53–235gbgb-engUniversity of Central Lancashire1
53–235dkUniversity of Copenhagen1
53–235deUniversity of Duisburg-Essen1
53–235gbgb-engUniversity of East Anglia1
53–235itUniversity of Florence1
53–235deUniversity of Freiburg1
53–235usUniversity of Georgia1
53–235deUniversity of Giessen1
53–235usUniversity of Hawai‘i1
53–235usUniversity of Illinois1
53–235gbgb-engUniversity of Leeds1
53–235gbgb-engUniversity of Leicester1
53–235frUniversity of Lorraine1
53–235deUniversity of Magdeburg1
53–235caUniversity of Manitoba1
53–235usUniversity of Massachusetts Amherst1
53–235auUniversity of Melbourne Medical School1
53–235usUniversity of Miami1
53–235itUniversity of Molise1
53–235beUniversity of Mons1
53–235esUniversity of Murcia1
53–235auUniversity of New South Wales1
53–235auUniversity of Newcastle1
53–235usUniversity of Oregon1
53–235deUniversity of Potsdam1
53–235auUniversity of Queensland1
53–235frUniversity of Rennes 11
53–235itUniversity of Sannio1
53–235eses-gaUniversity of Santiago de Compostela1
53–235caUniversity of Saskatchewan1
53–235cnUniversity of Science and Technology of China1
53–235zaUniversity of Stellenbosch Business School1
53–235auUniversity of Technology Sydney1
53–235usUniversity of Wisconsin-Milwaukee1
53–235usVassar College1
53–235beVrije Universiteit Brussel1
53–235usWayne State University1
53–235usWesleyan University1
53–235noWesterdals ACT1
53–235auWestern Hospital Footscray1
53–235usWestern Michigan University1
53–235usWestern Washington University1
53–235nzWhitireia Polytechnic1
53–235cnWuhan University1