The place to be for a PhD

Prestige plays a major role in academia. It’s why researchers dream of publishing their work in prestigious journals, like Nature and Science. It’s why you can find Harvard University sweaters all over the world, even though Harvard doesn’t actually have that many students. And it’s why people get all giddy about an opportunity to work or study at Oxford, even though there are plenty of other institutions that may have more to offer.

A decent chunk of a university’s prestige comes from rankings, of which there are many. A high position in one specific ranking usually doesn’t mean a lot. A high position in many different rankings on the other hand is a clear sign that a university is indeed prestigious (side note: So I guess it’s like ensemble learning, but for rankings?).

While prestige can afford you certain privileges, it does not play that much of a role in your day-to-day life as a graduate student. Rankings tend to be based on research output and recognition thereof, but you’re likely more concerned about things like quality of education, facilities, student life, affordability, the likelihood that your supervisor will be a Machiavellian psychopath, or the university’s primary topics of research.

Most rankings are therefore kind of useless for students.

I’m going to exacerbate this problem by introducing my own ranking, the Toilet Paper Rankings, which is solely based on the number of summarised papers in which an organisation, which is usually – but not always – a university, is mentioned as an affiliation. The list is updated daily, although it usually only changes once a week, when I publish a new paper summary.

Rank	Country	Organisation	Points
1		Carnegie Mellon University	10
2–3		Microsoft	8
2–3		North Carolina State University	8
4		Delft University of Technology	6
5		University of Zurich	5
6–9		Ben-Gurion University of the Negev	4
6–9		Singapore Management University	4
6–9		The Hebrew University of Jerusalem	4
6–9		University of Stuttgart	4
10–26		Chalmers University of Technology	3
10–26		Cornell University	3
10–26		Eindhoven University of Technology	3
10–26		Google	3
10–26		IBM Corporation	3
10–26		Monash University	3
10–26		Queen’s University	3
10–26		Stanford University	3
10–26		Tampere University	3
10–26		Università della Svizzera italiana	3
10–26		University of Bern	3
10–26		University of Helsinki	3
10–26		University of Oulu	3
10–26		University of Oxford	3
10–26		University of Toronto	3
10–26		University of Victoria	3
10–26		University of Washington	3
27–65		Concordia University	2
27–65		Curtin University	2
27–65		Durham University	2
27–65		Italian National Research Council	2
27–65		Jheronimus Academy of Data Science	2
27–65		Kyushu University	2
27–65		Lund University	2
27–65		Massachusetts Institute of Technology	2
27–65		Northern Arizona University	2
27–65		Northwestern University	2
27–65		Open University of the Netherlands	2
27–65		Peking University	2
27–65		Pivotal	2
27–65		Polytechnique Montréal	2
27–65		Stevens Institute of Technology	2
27–65		UC Berkeley	2
27–65		UC Davis	2
27–65		University College London	2
27–65		University of Amsterdam	2
27–65		University of Auckland	2
27–65		University of British Columbia	2
27–65		University of Calgary	2
27–65		University of Cambridge	2
27–65		University of Chicago	2
27–65		University of Gothenburg	2
27–65		University of Groningen	2
27–65		University of Illinois at Chicago	2
27–65		University of Jyväskylä	2
27–65		University of Luxembourg	2
27–65		University of Maryland	2
27–65		University of Oslo	2
27–65		University of Passau	2
27–65		University of Salerno	2
27–65		University of Sheffield	2
27–65		University of Southern California	2
27–65		Utrecht University	2
27–65		Vrije Universiteit Amsterdam	2
27–65		York University	2
27–65		Zurich University of Applied Sciences	2
66–270		Aalborg University	1
66–270		Aalto University	1
66–270		Aarhus University	1
66–270		Allegheny College	1
66–270		Arizona State University	1
66–270		Augusta University	1
66–270		Avans University of Applied Sciences	1
66–270		Baidu, Inc.	1
66–270		Bar-Ilan University	1
66–270		Barcelona Supercomputing Center	1
66–270		Bauhaus-Universität Weimar	1
66–270		Beijing Institute of Technology	1
66–270		Bilkent University	1
66–270		Blekinge Institute of Technology	1
66–270		Bloorview Research Institute	1
66–270		Boeing Research & Technology Europe	1
66–270		Boston University	1
66–270		British Geological Survey	1
66–270		BroadPath	1
66–270		California Institute of Technology	1
66–270		California Polytechnic State University	1
66–270		Carmenta Geospatial Technologies	1
66–270		CISPA Helmholtz Center for Information Security	1
66–270		Clarkson University	1
66–270		Clemson University	1
66–270		Clova AI Research	1
66–270		CNRS	1
66–270		CodeScene	1
66–270		Columbia Basin College	1
66–270		Columbia University	1
66–270		Conceptos Consulting	1
66–270		Cumhuriyet University	1
66–270		Don’t Forget the Bubbles	1
66–270		Drexel University	1
66–270		Eberhard Karls Universität Tübingen	1
66–270		Exact International Development	1
66–270		Facebook	1
66–270		Federal Institute of Rio Grande do Norte	1
66–270		Federal University of Amazonas	1
66–270		Federal University of Bahia	1
66–270		Federal University of Minas Gerais	1
66–270		Federal University of Pará	1
66–270		Federal University of Rio Grande do Norte	1
66–270		Federal University of Sergipe	1
66–270		FHV Vorarlberg University of Applied Sciences	1
66–270		Fraunhofer	1
66–270		Fraunhofer	1
66–270		Free University of Bozen-Bolzano	1
66–270		George Fox University	1
66–270		George Mason University	1
66–270		Georgia Institute of Technologyy	1
66–270		Harz University of Applied Sciences	1
66–270		Imperial College London	1
66–270		Inria	1
66–270		Institut Teknologi Bandung	1
66–270		Intruder Systems	1
66–270		Iowa State University	1
66–270		Iran Telecommunication Research Center	1
66–270		IRISA	1
66–270		Jane Street Capital	1
66–270		Jet Propulsion Laboratory	1
66–270		JetBrains Research	1
66–270		Johns Hopkins University	1
66–270		KAIST	1
66–270		Kansas State University	1
66–270		Karlsruhe Institute of Technology	1
66–270		Kennesaw State University	1
66–270		Kent State University	1
66–270		King’s College London	1
66–270		Korea Press Foundation	1
66–270		KTH Royal Institute of Technology	1
66–270		Lady Cilento Children’s Hospital	1
66–270		Leadership Footprint	1
66–270		Leibniz Institute for Neurobiology	1
66–270		Leicester Royal Infirmary	1
66–270		Leiden University	1
66–270		Loyola College	1
66–270		Maastricht University	1
66–270		Max Planck Institute for Research on Collective Goods	1
66–270		Max Planck Institute for Security and Privacy	1
66–270		McGill University	1
66–270		Meta	1
66–270		Meta4	1
66–270		METOP GmbH	1
66–270		Montclair State University	1
66–270		Multitudes	1
66–270		Murdoch University	1
66–270		Netflix	1
66–270		Nokia Bell Labs	1
66–270		Northeastern University	1
66–270		Norwegian University of Science and Technology	1
66–270		NTNU	1
66–270		Oakland University	1
66–270		Ontario Tech University	1
66–270		Örebro University	1
66–270		Oregon State University	1
66–270		Østfold University College	1
66–270		Otto von Guericke University Magdeburg	1
66–270		Paderborn University	1
66–270		Philipps University Marburg	1
66–270		Polytechnic Institute of Tomar	1
66–270		Polytechnic University of Milan	1
66–270		Polytechnique Montreal	1
66–270		Radboud University	1
66–270		Rochester Institute of Technology	1
66–270		Rolls-Royce plc	1
66–270		Ruhr University Bochum	1
66–270		Saarland University	1
66–270		Sauce Labs	1
66–270		SEB Life & Pension Holding AB Riga Branch	1
66–270		Shanghai Jiao Tong University	1
66–270		Simula Research Laboratory	1
66–270		SINTEF	1
66–270		Software Improvement Group	1
66–270		Swinburne University of Technology	1
66–270		Swisscom	1
66–270		Sydney Children’s Hospital	1
66–270		Technische Universität München	1
66–270		Tecnalia	1
66–270		Texas A&M University	1
66–270		The College of William and Mary	1
66–270		The Hong Kong University of Science and Technology	1
66–270		The Liberators	1
66–270		The Open University	1
66–270		The Royal London Hospital	1
66–270		The University of New Mexico	1
66–270		Tilburg University	1
66–270		U-Hopper	1
66–270		UAM Iztapalapa	1
66–270		Umm Al-Qura University	1
66–270		Universidad de los Andes	1
66–270		Universidad Rey Juan Carlos	1
66–270		Universidade Federal de Pernambuco	1
66–270		Universidade Tecnológica Federal do Paraná	1
66–270		Università della Svizzera italiana	1
66–270		University Carlos III of Madrid	1
66–270		University College Cork	1
66–270		University College Ghent	1
66–270		University of Adelaide	1
66–270		University of Alabama	1
66–270		University of Alberta	1
66–270		University of Applied Sciences Northwestern Switzerland	1
66–270		University of Arizona	1
66–270		University of Arkansas	1
66–270		University of Barcelona	1
66–270		University of Basel	1
66–270		University of Bologna	1
66–270		University of Brasília	1
66–270		University of California, Los Angeles	1
66–270		University of California, Santa Cruz	1
66–270		University of Castilla-La Mancha	1
66–270		University of Castilla–La Mancha	1
66–270		University of Central Lancashire	1
66–270		University of Copenhagen	1
66–270		University of Duisburg-Essen	1
66–270		University of East Anglia	1
66–270		University of Florence	1
66–270		University of Freiburg	1
66–270		University of Geneva	1
66–270		University of Genoa	1
66–270		University of Georgia	1
66–270		University of Giessen	1
66–270		University of Hawai‘i	1
66–270		University of Illinois	1
66–270		University of Klagenfurt	1
66–270		University of Leeds	1
66–270		University of Leicester	1
66–270		University of Lorraine	1
66–270		University of Magdeburg	1
66–270		University of Malta	1
66–270		University of Manitoba	1
66–270		University of Massachusetts Amherst	1
66–270		University of Melbourne Medical School	1
66–270		University of Miami	1
66–270		University of Milano-Bicocca	1
66–270		University of Molise	1
66–270		University of Mons	1
66–270		University of Murcia	1
66–270		University of New South Wales	1
66–270		University of Newcastle	1
66–270		University of Oregon	1
66–270		University of Potsdam	1
66–270		University of Queensland	1
66–270		University of Rennes 1	1
66–270		University of Sannio	1
66–270		University of Santiago de Compostela	1
66–270		University of Saskatchewan	1
66–270		University of Science and Technology of China	1
66–270		University of Stellenbosch Business School	1
66–270		University of Technology Sydney	1
66–270		University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee	1
66–270		Vanderbilt University	1
66–270		Vassar College	1
66–270		Vincit	1
66–270		Vrije Universiteit Brussel	1
66–270		Wayne State University	1
66–270		Wesleyan University	1
66–270		Westerdals ACT	1
66–270		Western Hospital Footscray	1
66–270		Western Michigan University	1
66–270		Western Washington University	1
66–270		Whitireia Polytechnic	1
66–270		William & Mary	1
66–270		Wuhan University	1
66–270		Yale University	1